The Crows

We have a little family of crows in our backyard.  I say “our backyard”, but the house was vacant for nearly ten years before we moved in.  So, let’s be honest, it’s us taking up space in the crows’ yard. 

We are having a tricky time adapting to each other.  They are loud and squawky.  They terrorize the other birds, the squirrels, our cats.  I’ve gone outside and waved my arms around like a crazy lady.  “Be nice!  Play nice!  Or git!”  The puffy, fluffy one (I’m thinking this is the baby) just looks at me.  He doesn’t speak crazy lady.

The more I pay attention to these guys, the more I’m wondering if all the ruckus is about teaching.  If the parent crows are teaching this younger crow how to be a good crow.  How to protect the food source.  How to chase off intruders.  I don’t really know though because as much as these guys don’t speak crazy lady, I also don’t speak crow.

Puzzling Interactions

And though this isn’t a surprise, what is a surprise to me is how much I find myself puzzled in my interactions with other humans.  You would think, being of the same species, and most certainly speaking the same human language – English – that living in peace with each other would be easy.  And yet, of course, we all know it’s not.

Most days I’m wandering around in the outside world, I’m inhabiting the inside world of my head.  My interactions stem from any given story line I’m following in my mind.  And we’re all doing this.  In this way there are infinite realities unfolding at any given time. It’s a wonder that we, as people, are even connecting at all!  From this perspective, though, it is very easy to understand the misunderstandings.

I remember before I had my kids, I was in a grocery store where a woman was losing her temper with her handsy, mouthy, young child.  I was offended and muttered loud enough to be heard as I passed by that a little patience could go a long way.  I cringe now as I remember it.  Having kids of your own is a very humbling experience. Ooof.  Who knows what that poor woman and her child were about.  I certainly had no idea what was going on and was out of line in my vocal judgement.

Some days, my best efforts would draw the judgements of younger me for sure.  And yet, I am learning there is much grace and kindness in accepting myself and my best efforts, especially when it appears to be less than my productive expectations.

A Few Things About Crows

I do know a few things about crows:  They have long memories and teach their crow kids to remember the good and bad people they come into contact with.  Also, they like shiny things and will give gifts in situations where there is long-standing trust and snacks.  (My mom had some crow buddies for years that left her little trinkets from time to time.)

So, I’m going to wave my arms frantically around much less, and sit quietly and watch and listen more.  I’m sure there is much to be learned from these swooping, squawking neighbors, trying their darndest to be good parents.  My hope is that we can peacefully inhabit our spaces together.  This will involve some tolerance from all of us.  Peace always requires a measure of tolerance from us all. 

I’ve left a shiny token on one of the baby crow’s favorite perching spots.  It might be ridiculous.  It might sit out there until I get annoyed at looking at it and decide to bring it back in.  Or, it might be the beginning of some connective curiosity between our species.  I know which one I’m hoping for. And time will tell~

If you are a great communicator and connector, or if you find yourself muddled in misunderstandings, let’s be gentle with each other so we can be friends~